This is a difficult website for me to be on right now. I was dumb and looked at my “face” page and it was ultimately covered in pictures of you. I didn’t want to write a long post about it because I know it’s something thats personal and I didn’t know exactly what I was going to say. So instead I’m just sitting here typing everything I’m thinking. I’m sorry it had to end like this; it’s not the way I wanted it to happen. You deserve so much and the way it happened wasn’t what you deserved. None of this was easy for me or for you, but it had to happen. I feel like I lost a part of myself today. One-fifth of my life has been taken away and I don’t know how to make myself feel okay about it. I can’t respond to your message because nothing I say will make this okay.
All things must come to an end.
Last night I laid it all out on the table. I said what I felt and patiently waited for a response. And the response crushed my heart. People always tell you not to regret what you do; that you should learn from your experiences. So that’s what my goal is to do.
You put your heart on the line. Your passion. Your interests. To be a success, you don’t have to succeed every time. I broke down in class today because I had the realization that I wasn’t good enough. However the truth is… I am good enough and they just don’t realize it yet.
Nikolai Berdyaev said, “Pure truth could burst the world apart.” Last night, I let me world explode and while I’m still processing everything that has happened, the “end of the world” is not truly to end of the world. Life is about learning from experience. And oh boy, this was an experience.
- J.J. - Criminal Minds
- Kevin Breel (via andersonmelissa)
I just climbed up on to that stage and I spoke. Well, I stepped onto the table for the first ceremony and the stage for the second, but I have never felt more confident and strong in my life. With a fractured foot and an upper respiratory infection, I am unstoppable.
It’s amazing how things change. One day, you know everything about someone and the next, it’s like they were never really there.
I can dig it.